Innerpeace

i am so so thankful to everyone who cares about me..thank you dawn..n florrine n betty..so so much..it's since sec 4 or sth since we were classmates or good friends n now that we hardly talk or see each other yu all still cared n encouraged me..now i feel guilty n ashamed. i will continue practising hard, listen to the exam pieces more often..n try to pull up my scales and oral parts..hope it'll help..few more months left..though i dun really believe when my teacher said i still have hope..maybe i really do..nvm..just keep working..god will be fair n allow me to get what i deserve..
thanks sarah n baoxin..who never stop believing in me..why why why..ok this stress is healthy..to be a doctor yu must love stress rite sarah? ok..

today was the end of the cip camp..so pple how was it? maybe half of the children din enjoy themselves..cos they din wanna join in the games..cos the goats were smelly..cos i din allow them to run around n i wanted maximum order at all times..volunteers? was it fine? was it the most disorganised and screwed up cip camp yu've ever attended? i'm sorry for raising my voices..for making yu guys tag along the children strictly at all times..a lot of pple are expecting me to bring the children back home safe..i'm sorry i was naggy and bossy n loud. i'm sorry. n i admit..the games part wasn't properly planned hence the chaos..i assumed it will be easy and fun..i overlooked many problems..i didn't think through it carefully..

sorry if it was boring..sorry i tired yu guys out..but i promise..ever since april or may i've been trying my best..n giving up my studies just to get this cip camp done and give yu guys your cip hours..i dunno how screwed my common tests will be. last year i gave up the camp for my promos..now's my punishment. after the two tiring days..hope everyone gets enough rest n mug hard..i dunno what the canoeists and boon lay pple n first aid pple think of me now..the squashers know very well what kind of person i am..i'm sorry if i made yu hate me..sorry if i left a bad impression..just hope yu'll see the better side of me one day.

i think this is my stupid weakness. why regret so much n say a whole load of stupid sorries after everything is done? i should have made everything perfect and planned everything properly before the event. i just wanna let everyone know that i've really tried. call me a loser if yu want. But to make myself happier, i shall only think about the smiles on the children's and volunteers' faces. i hope it was a good learning experience for everyone..if not this camp has failed .