Inferiority Complex
Seriously, Singaporeans have no life. on the way home on 154 as usual..recognised some familiar faces whom i met either every morning or evening..e bus was real quiet n slow-moving..was it crawling seriously i dunno..but time certainly passes real slowly when i carn wait to get home to rest..ok..quiet bus..no one moved in their seats..not even a slight hand movement or loosening of joints after the long bus ride..everyone's practically stoning lifelessly in their seats..not bothering at all about the people just beside them..scary..n cold..

suddenly i saw the Guiness advertisement..it said something like.."Someone will do it, why not you?" It was like my guiding light and encouragement..telling me to grab the opportunity provided to me before it is gone..n do not think so lowly of yourself..because lack of confidence will bring you no where..

i still doubt my ability..i dunno..i get scared thinking about my future..thinking about my near future..thinking about my J2 life..thinking of how i'm gonna train three times a week n have lessons from 8 to 7 on 2 other days..such kind of life..by the time i reach home at nite at 8..i would have no energy to continue doing tutorials or revision anymore..n would just collaspe on the bed..am i supposed to get 4 As like that?? how did they do it..

God bless me and bless all my friends who are hardworking and strive all the way to achieve what they think they deserve..

It's Over..or is it?

yea..promotional examinations are finally over..on friday after that hideous killer biology paper set by some nuts teachers..my class went to plaza singapura for dinner at thai express..was i supposed to feel excited and joyous? don't know..but i was quite stone actually..it's like..i could still continue studying for as long as ever..n come to think about it..yea it's non-stop..lectures will still go on..tutorials still have to be done..so what's there to celebrate? i can't wait to receive my results..whether they're good or bad..juz wanna see what my efforts had earned me..

i couldn't rest..this saturday morning..though i slept till 11 finally..i was still quite uneasy..a lot of things continue haunting me..things like project work..piano lessons..n exercising to get my 3 layers of fats off my body..disgusting yu know..jamie mich n jw know how i got them..double lunches..ice cream n all that junk..oh well..

i'm arranging my table slowly as images of me with my head in between my books flash so vividly in my mind..suddenly i think i've changed..ok i'm not making sense to anyone..only i myself will know..

watched underworld at 9.45 last nite..damn cool show..with the immortals n tt ugly looking beasts prancing up n down e walls..haha the vampires look so much better, especially kate beckinsale in her black costumes..n though her hair's always messy after fighting those likens(dunno how to spell)..she still looks so good..anywae the show was veh exciting..n quite farney..like new age vampires with beautiful posh cars and laptops..haha but one thing i din enjoy the movie is the gory n gross scenes with a chopped off head n some distorted face..it's juz damn gross k..

going out again soon..though i wun mind staying at home to rest..like really have a good rest..i think i can spend the whole day in fornt of the tv with star movies and hbo..heh n of cos with my beautiful brother..

to everyone..play hard n enjoy..soon all will be over..next year's gonna be hell..

"everything is meaningless until i find meaning in meaning what i mean."

...i think e above quote is damn cool..from yy's blog..my sis was reading it out while i was in e middle of cell biology..haha..then i was like..waahhhh..

Exhilaration

Happy~ sha la la..it's so nice to be happy~! sha la la/..heh i'm feeling very high on this crucial night..the night before my Promotional examinations. although i still carn set my self in the examination mood yet..(not at all preparing to sit in the examination hall..) but i bet i'll shiver tml at the sight of everyone scrambling to their seats..praying hard..and sending last min wishes to friends..

gosh this is so exciting..i'm finally sitting for my general paper..the one paper which i'll do the worst in..(ok be optimistic my dear..) fine..and very soon..i'll be off shopping and watching movies and squashing n just relaxing at home..finally..for once..it's so near yet so far..oh gosh i can seriously feel it..i even planned my activities for the next weekend~!!! i'm so happy happy happy~!!! ok..shall go to sleep now and attempt to retain my happiness till tomorrow morning..good luck to me..good luck to everyone..

he just said sth that was really sincere and sweet..and what that short message of a few words told me..was that i was important to him..and that i'm going to continue to play a dominant role in his future..

what more can i ask..i'm blessed..

You don't know me

oh so yu call this whining? this is pouring out my feelings..this is talking about my life..this is what i feel..i'm not complaining to ANY SINGLE SOUL..n yu have the right to choose not to read what yu see if yu dun like it..oh gosh..i hafta put on false fronts in front of my frens n close ones many a time..leik when i'm so stressed or unhappy..i still smile n pretend i'm doing fine n heck care about everything..it's not easy ok..n now back home in my little corner in my private blog..i still hafta cater to blog surfers' taste and blog stuff which yu like to read..sorry yu came to the wrong blog..

of cos there's more to life than mugging..like frens..family..shopping..fooling around n juz appreciating what's around yu..AS IF I DUN DO THAT..today i spent an hour chatting with jamie n listening to songs and went for pizza with tian at night..n yu yu yu>?? bet yu're busy spending precious time with yur books..who's not appreciating life? yu tell me..

i'm a veh sensitive person who's easily affected by what pple thinks abt me..all my frens know that..but i;ve learnt sth..that is to accept it..n get over it fast..yay

anyway i wanna thank god for blessing me with such a wonderful guy..i;'ve got a few more days left..i pray for the best..

Misery

dear blog..i juz tried my sch's 2001 chem promo paper..yes mcq..timed myself n finished quite fast..but found it tough..din know it's so bad..yea i got 8/15..for mcq..it's a O..oh man i got so disheartened i gave up on the paper..dun dare to do the open ended section anymore..n decided to go back to ten-year-series..
why why why..i've been working hard n doing all the tys questions..why's rj's paper so much tougher..am i really fated to get on O for chem..i've really been working hard towards a D or C..is that so hard..i dun believe..okay i'm gonna continue practising tys..till my emotions stabalise before i'll face the promo paper again..

god pls help me..

thought i'm really quite strong.. not giving up n continue working hard consistently towards better grades..but think i need more than juz hard work..perhaps luck n blessings..whatever

Pushing On

Hey..know wad..i've really nice frens..many sincere thanks to yj..sarah..nita..pam..n andrew~!! wow it's been ages since i last visited my blog n was surprised to see andrew's msg..hmm haha aniwae yea really gotta thank my classmates..really wonderful pple..who encourage me..console me..n motivate me to mug n mug n mug..haha seriously i love them..although i'm not tt happy that there's some discrimination in class..but nvm..pple try not to be so mean sometimes..if yu're not provoked..then don't be mean ok..make peace..

these few days i've been mugging..at my steady pace although i know tt at this pace i'm never gonna finish..but when i mug..i wanna make sure i really know the topic before i go on to the next..don't know if this will cause my downfall..but nvm..i'm taking things slowly..

congraTS betty..but luckily i still have a week more to mug..i'm thankful for tt..betty..hope yur papers were okay..hope yu will score for your lit n history..cos yu put effort in them..i hope yu've put in enough effort k..celebrate hard~!!!

happy birthday to dearest amanda and christine~!!!! haha amanda's so hot eh..got secret admirer ok..she thinks it's a prank..haha..she's shy man..heh

to all my frens..mug hard..last week left before we can celebrate for one day..n continue mugging for AO chinese n SATS and do project work n get real busy for Open House and my CCA cip..oh well..come to think about it..i'd rather be mugging than be busy with all sort of duties all over again..

life's quite nice now..just pure mugging n practising piano..
but i wanna get back to the part where i can shop n watch movie at orchard every weekend..heh i'm suffering from the "miss-shopping" syndrome..wonder if Mango have new arrivals..haha/..now now..back to mugging..

latest personal hit.. Yu Jian by Stephanie Sun..haha..Jay Zhou's Qing Tian is No. 3..opps